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Old 12-23-2015, 09:51 PM
davesgirl davesgirl is offline
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Default My Heart is Broken

I'm not usually much of a talker on WUC, but I am on here several times a day checking in on the deals and what everyone is up to. I feel like a part of the WUC family here, even though most of you do not know me. I wish I could "introduce"myself in a happier way, but I feel like I need some friends and knew that I could find that here. Seven weeks ago, I found out that my boyfriend, with whom I have lived for 11 years, has been unfaithful. He has been living a double life with a woman he works with for the past five years. Giving her large sums of money, getting her an apartment closer to OUR home so he could go there before and after work. Long story short, he left one morning to go to work, kissed me goodbye, and never came home. I found proof that this was going on (receipts, etc.), called him at work, we argued and he moved in with the other woman that evening. I have not seen him since, and he will only talk to me via email. Not a day has gone by that I have not cried over this. I am devastated that I have spent 11 years of my life loving a man and realize I never knew him at all. And to top it all off, he served me and my sons (who he has brought up as his own, and calls them "his sons") with an eviction notice to move out of the home we share together by December 31st. The house IS paid for by him, and only his name is on the house because we aren't married. I was, as he was happy to say, June Cleaver. I stayed home and cooked and cleaned and made sure the house ran smoothly so that he could come home from work and relax. So needless to say, we have been scrambling to find a new, affordable (cheap) place to live with no notice. During the holidays. Sorry this is so long, I just really needed to talk and I knew that WUCKies would understand.
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Old 12-23-2015, 10:14 PM
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moonshadow8679 moonshadow8679 is offline
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Bless you hon! Have you reached out to local help (Salvation Army, etc?) they may can give y'all a hand. How old are the boys? I shall keep you in my prayers. I think we've traded before if you need any qs or anything like that shoot me a pm I'll brainstorm on some ideas for y'all.

Love has reasons which reason cannot understand.
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Old 12-23-2015, 10:37 PM
Philly_Girl Philly_Girl is offline
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Make him officially file an eviction which will give you at least 90 days to move. Not fair to put you & your children out in 1 week. Look into common law marriage in your state to see if it applies & entitled to any benefits. Prayers for you & your sons.

KARMA is real & they both will get theirs.

Cry if you want/need to. Sunshine (happiness)comes after the rain (tears).

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Old 12-23-2015, 11:30 PM
emmakate7 emmakate7 is offline
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Philly_Girl said exactly what I wanted to say. You may be entitled to way more than you think. I know it is hard to see now but you really dodged a bullet with him. It does not say much for his character and you deserve so much more. Hugs to you!
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Old 12-24-2015, 12:02 AM
neenee05 neenee05 is offline
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I just looked up NY. Common law marriage is not recognized in your state, unless you moved their from another state that recognizes common law marriages. Do you have any family nearby that might help you out?
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Old 12-24-2015, 12:50 AM
corear corear is offline
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I am so sorry this happened to you. I know you are probably devastated right now. I was also wondering if you have any family close by that might could help you out a little?
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Old 12-24-2015, 01:00 AM
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Please tell me that you have some sort of "official " Mail than comes there in your name, if so that should be all you need to establish residency and then he should have to go through the court system to evict you, meaning at least an extra 90 days to find a new place.

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Old 12-24-2015, 01:28 AM
ConfusedBeginner ConfusedBeginner is offline
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You can make some quickish cash on Amazon Mechanical Turk, just check out reddit's Hits Worth Turking for to get started. Bing has a reward system that is super easy but doesn't pay as much. There are tons of side hustle options. Let me know if you need any help getting started! Check out realwaystoearnmoneyonline.com for other opportunities. I've done a lot of the work at home gigs when my family was ill and I had to stop working outside the home in order to care for them. I eventually went back to my old job but the online stuff kept me sane and financially stable when I needed it. Writing is my number one suggestion followed by Amazon Turk and tutoring.

Can you file for emergency food stamps? How about Medicaid?

Do you need any codes or coupons? PM if you do and I'll send you some.

Did he use your credit card to pay for the other lady? It would be fab if he left some sort of money trail proof. Was your name on anything? Do you have a canceled check or bill that will show you paid for something in that house? It might help.

You might contact your state's legal aid group to see about other options.

I'm so sorry this happened. Talk about lousy timing! What does his family think? Can you rough up his reputation? Especially since you've been together for so long and you have children that he was helping to raise even if not biologically his. I'd let it slip to his boss, to his family, to anyone who can apply pressure that he's kicking you all out on the street. All that could put you in a better position to negotiate your living situation and allow you to get some help.

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Old 12-24-2015, 02:22 AM
CaliforniaGrannyof2 CaliforniaGrannyof2 is offline
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Stay strong and know that I am PRAYING for you & your boys! I too am really sorry to hear that this has happened to you........I agree as it has already been stated, I believe you may be entitled to more than you think. Make every minute count in letting EVERYONE know what kind of person he really is and the fact he's now attempting to have you all put out of the home you shared.......always remember that........GOD TAKES CARE OF HIS CHILDREN, HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU!!!!!
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Old 12-24-2015, 05:46 AM
bueltoby bueltoby is offline
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How about 'palimony' ? Legal aid may be able to help you with an eviction fight - I worked for them for several years and NEVER saw a tenant or mortgage payor leave without their permission.
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